A CHARMING PERSONALITY

 

Personality is a person's enduring characteristics and behaviors that help them adjust to life. It includes their interests, drives, values, self-concept, abilities, and emotional patterns. The word "personality" comes from the Latin word persona, which means "mask". It is a product of both biology and environment, and it remains fairly consistent throughout life. Personality influences a person's environment, cognition, emotions, motivations, and behaviors in various situations. It also predicts how a person will react to other people, problems, and stress. One can gain insights into a person's personality by observing their communication styles, body language, and decision-making approaches.

Personality embraces moods, attitudes, and opinions and is most clearly expressed in interactions with other people. It includes behavioral characteristics, both inherent and acquired, that distinguish one person from another and that can be observed in people's relations to the environment and to the social group. If one is attracted towards a person then perhaps these are the traits, in various combinations and in various degrees, that make them attractive:

·        Courage.

·        Trustworthiness, including honesty, reliability, punctuality, and loyalty.

·        Integrity.

·        Respect and courtesy.

·        Responsibility, including accountability, diligence, perseverance, self-management skills, and self-control.

·        Fairness, including justice and freedom from prejudice.

 

Who wouldn’t want a capturing personality that enables us to lead, connect with others easily, convince anyone to support us, and resolve any quarrel with irresistible personal charm? I have, in the past, written quite a few blogs on personality development, the most pertinent one being: https://surajitbrainwaves.blogspot.com/2018/09/how-to-cultivate-good-personality.html

 

People with great personalities are more likely to succeed, so it's not surprising that many people try to improve themselves and their communication skills. Part of this improvement process focuses on developing or strengthening features that people can’t resist, and if you want to have a good influence on people, you just need to recognize and adopt them.

 

1. Confidence

People who are self-confident do not compare themselves to others all the time. They rely first and foremost on their own minds and abilities and do not blame their environment for their emotional state. Instead of losing themselves in relationships or workplaces, people who have high self-confidence build and maintain their relationships based on their own personal plans and dreams - they know what they want to achieve and make sure they do so. When you feel confident in your personality and in the decisions you make, those around you will be impressed by your management and decisiveness. These people never lament being victims of circumstances, instead they create the circumstances of success for both themselves and others.

 

2. Honesty

Honest people are not afraid to tell the truth. They are direct in their judgment and open to themselves just as they are exposed and true to their environment. People are happy to talk with honest people because they can be trusted, and relationships become simpler, clearer and safer when everything is on the table and there is nothing to hide. In addition, in a romantic relationship it is easier to trust honest people - and for a healthy relationship, trust is priceless. In business relations honesty is the best policy and with friends and family, honesty is the only policy.

 

3. Trustworthiness

Without trust, any relationship - whether in the workplace, romantic or platonic - will quickly disintegrate. It is therefore very important that you establish yourself as a reliable person whose words and actions can be trusted, from minor matters to the big and significant things. This is the only way to get people to be pulled to you and trust you with all their hearts. For big time success in business (Ratan Tata), politics (Narendra Modi), performing arts (Amitabh Bacchan), Sports (Roger Federrer) trustworthiness is simply non-negotiable.

 

4. Sensitivity 

Sensitivity is about being able to sense the swings and changes in other’s moods, as well as to being empathetic towards them. Sensitive relationships begin with the smallest things, such as noticing when your partner wakes up on the wrong side of the bed, and bigger things such as noticing when your partner feels jealous. For example, in order to attract others, you must be aware of their feelings. If, for instance, one of your colleagues seems different, preoccupied or looks down in the dumps, don’t hesitate to take interest and offer an empathetic ear. Doing this guarantees that you’ll be able to bring people closer to you and be seen in a positive light.

 

5. Be supportive  

 It's not enough to just recognize that someone is going through something. You also need to know how to support them. You should make others feel that you are "on their team" and that, together, you’ll be able to overcome anything, big or small. The confidence and support you provide them will encourage them to act, make them part of your team, and perhaps even bring others closer to you. Being supportive in moments of crisis gives you a reputation of being a reliable and sympathetic individual.

 

6. Express interest

In addition to being supportive in times of need, in order to become an irresistible person, you should adopt a curious and healthy interest in others. Reach out to people you haven’t heard from in a long time, whether by phone or social media. In this way, you’ll be able to regain friends you’ve lost along the way and even make some new ones. If your partner is prepared to go with you to the stadium to watch cricket she is showing interest in things you like. So make sure you accompany her in a music concert, which is of her interest.

 

7. Loyalty

Loyalty is one of the most important qualities, not only in romantic relationships but in any relationship. Knowing that you can wholeheartedly trust another person who won’t knowingly betray you or try to hurt you, even when tempted, is very important to everyone. But first of all, you have to adopt this attribute for yourself. Always be loyal to your beliefs, views, and path and this will show others that you can be loyal to them as well. The crisis of loyalty is most evident in politicians, who change loyalty with seasons, and that is why you don’t tend to respect most of them.

 

8. A sense of humor

Our sense of humor can help us easily overcome minor problems, resolve small conflicts and quarrels, and generally make life more enjoyable. When a person has a sense of humor, a touch of irony and self-awareness, they are often perceived as being easy to love and cherish. Therefore, even if you are not naturally funny, you may want to remember some jokes and funny stories to draw people closer to you. However, a forced sense of humor may also be petty repulsive, so don’t overdo it.

 

9. Patience

Patience and restraint can be expressed in everyday life in all kinds of ways: if you can wait in line without whining and trying to push your way past, if you stubbornly avoid falling into life’s many obstacles, and if you know how to strive steadily to achieve your goal - you have patience. People find this attribute very attractive. If you haven’t been blessed and your patience tends to be very short, it is highly recommended that you work on it.

 

10. Optimism

It’s always nicer to be around a joyous person who radiates happiness. In order to adopt infectious optimism, you have to start seeing the good in life and know how to enjoy the moment. An optimistic person helps others and encourages them not to give up and stick to their goals, and, in doing so, brings them closer. When you are in a relationship, this approach will help you and your partner see all the little problems and troubles as smaller than they seem at first, and this feeling can strengthen the relationship and make your partner stick with you for the long run. Like

 

11. Likeability 

When given the choice between a sulky, angry, and sarcastic person and a calm-headed, forgiving, and compromising person, all would choose the latter. Likeability is part of the vast majority of traits that we’ve talked about so far, but it is also a trait within itself. Even a small smile will make others feel warm and happy –so start spreading them around and no one will be able to resist your charm.

 

12. Politeness and respect

If you can remain polite and calm despite provocation it is a priceless gift. We may disagree with people, but we do not have to be disagreeable. Impolite words and deeds, disrespectful gestures and utterances burn the bridges, which you might have to cross again in future. Walking out of a controversy with your head held high after politely putting your point of view is an art worth cultivating.

I choose my friends very carefully with the selfish motive of learning something good from them. I do not find all the traits in all my friends, but they end up forming a very beautiful kaleidoscope of personalities and I try to imbibe the good bits from everyone, even without their knowledge. By simply listening and watching people we get the opportunity to learn and improve.