DISCOVER THE CHILD WITHIN YOU

 

 

Childhood was very different. I was a different person. As a child I used to know something that as an adult I have forgotten. I was far surer and far more confident; you can call it childhood ignorance. I was more courageous, you can label it as juvenile bravado. And I enjoyed life more intensely than I rarely did as an adult. I often look back at my childhood years and cannot help but think of them as the best years of my life. I was a carefree spirit; I lived in the present moment; I had no anxieties and I had no fears. I often wish that I could return to the innocence and zest for life I once had when I was a child.

 

I believe that we can all learn something from our younger selves to bring more clarity and joy into adulthood. The insular existence during the pandemic has made me realize that it is very important not to let the child inside us die. The fact of the matter is that the child inside us never dies; it is just sitting there in the corner, facing the wall, banished by our adult sensibilities. It was not his fault, pressure from parents, teachers, bosses or society, who often told that don’t be a kid, stop behaving childish, think logically etc. has forced him to go and sit in the corner. By suppressing this innocent, spontaneous, curious, inquisitive, effervescent and enthusiastic child inside us we have invited a dull and stressful life, without any excitement and with very little happiness.

 

How was the childhood me different?

 

So what was that child, who is now sitting in the corner facing the wall, like when I was young and he ruled supreme? I never cared about anything and enjoyed every moment of life. There were several good reasons for that and so let us see why it is important to keep the child inside you alive and happy:

1.      A child has a carefree attitude and gives a damn to the society, thus if we keep the child inside, active it will keep you strong and away from all the negative demands of society.

2.      A child is always full of hope and has positive outlook towards everything and for it nothing is impossible.

3.      A child is not at all biased towards anything or anyone and is true to all, thus it will ensure that we remain honest to ourselves and others.

4.      The child inside you will keep you motivated throughout and will enable you to complete the task because a child never quits anything. For e.g. an infant will keep on trying to walk no matter how many time it falls.

5.      A child is never limited by any boundaries or rules and thus catering to the inner child will make sure that we get free from all the undue rules and limitations posed by the society.

6.      A child is a very good learner because he/she has no ego and keeps on asking questions and learning new things and that to without any hesitation. However as an adult we feel that asking too many questions may not be appreciated by others and theywe might become a laughing stalk by all.

7.      A child is very energetic and ready for everything, no matter what happens and thus keeping the child inside us alive will make us feel active and have a positive and a always ready attitude towards everything.

8.      Child is full of creativity in each and every aspect of life. Painting outside the drawn lines is a rule of childhood! Their creativity can come out with ways which we can never think of.

9.      A child has faith/ trust on all (on friends, parents, teachers etc.) but we suffer from trust deficit issues because we have suppressed the child inside us.

Growing up is a continuous process and we become mature both mentally and physically with every passing day, and also we keep on becoming more and more wise with time and experience but all this should not be at the cost of suppression of the inner child. That childlike innocence, curiosity, perseverance, creativity, keenness to learn and faith are vital for our progress.

 

Bring back the child inside you from the lonely corner

 

According to our Hindu philosophy we believe in Aham Bhamhasmi - I am divine. So are you. How many of us practice this philosophy in our adult life? Yet that is what we believed in when we were children, and so this must be the default mode of all humankind! So as we grow why do we diverge from this solemn path?

 

This innocent child, as he grew up, was taught, influenced and manipulated by the society. Therefore today this child is working 13 out of 24 hours at a job he/she wants to run away from, trying so hard to keep his/her marriage going, wanting to give some time to his/her family. And at the end of the day, this child buries his head in a pillow, cries to himself as he tries sleep at night. This child is tired of trying to match the society’s standards and live up to other's expectations. This child just wants to live. He wishes to go back being the child he was. 

 

The child within us was different

 

Close your eyes and try to think, you will soon get in touch with your childhood version and now see how different you were! As children we were remarkably different:

 

1. They see each day as a new beginning. When you are young, a day can feel like an eternity. Yet with each new day we are aware of the new prospects and new opportunities to make new friends, explore new adventures and learn new things. Every day is an opportunity to start afresh. And, unlike adults, children do not carry baggage from one day to the next. Yesterday’s fights were buried and a new day would start afresh!

 

2. They are fearless. Children are more willing to explore and try new things. They are unaware of the consequences and are more willing to try something new. If they injure themselves they use it as an opportunity to learn from their mistakes. As adults, we often hold ourselves back, predominantly because of fear. We stop ourselves from taking chances and seeing what happens. Successful people tend to be those that step out of their boundaries and take risks. A ship is most safe anchored in the harbor but it is of most use when it sails seven seas!

 

3. They lose themselves in creative projects. A child can often be seen getting lost in a creative project for hours at a time, be it drawing, playing with clay, building a sand castle, and so on. Yet, as we get older, we stop seeing creative activities as worthwhile. How many adults do you know (aside from artists) who spend their free time drawing, playing with clay or finger painting?

 

4. They find joy in most things and laugh every day. Children have a beautiful ability to find joy all around them. They see silliness everywhere. They can innocently stare at a mundane bill board and start clapping because it has a car staring down at them. They can pull a beard and see if it can come out like the spectacles.

 

5. They cry if they feel like it. Crying is not often an emotion that adults feel comfortable expressing, yet children do so all the time. Crying helps release our emotions in a normal, healthy way. Yet, instead, we always make it a point to keep it in check. Consequently, we end up keeping our emotions to ourselves. At times, it's okay for us to be a little more open and vulnerable with people we feel comfortable around.

 

6. They are active. Thinking back of to my younger years, it was a joy to play outside, running around until I was out of breath and my clothes soiled. I never thought of being active as exercise or daily fitness, for me, I was just playing and it was fun. Can you honestly say the same for your morning gym?

 

7. They are more willing to try new things. Children will attempt to play a sport that they have never tried before. They are more willing to jump on a trampoline or dive into a pool, or ski down a mountain, even if they have never done so before. Adults tend to have a fear of the unknown and prefer to stay in their comfort zone, rarely venturing out. Adventure though can make us feel exhilarated and awakened.

 

8. They are enthusiastic. Children often tend to have so much enthusiasm and zeal. They feel lots of excitement, and are hopeful and optimistic. We too should learn to approach life in a more optimistic way. As adults, we often tend to dwell on the negative. Children have no burden of negatives and no fear of failure.

 

9. They nurture friendships. Observe children playing with their friends, they often find pure joy in doing so and are always keen to make new ones. Children tend to enjoy their many activities too - they join soccer teams, go to birthday parties and enjoy quite a number of after school activities too. As a child I was not aware of caste, religion, race, gender and all my playmates came in one category – friends.

 

10. They notice the little things. The simple things that we often take for granted tend to bring incredible joy and profound inspiration to children. They notice the tiny miracles that surround them each day. How much more beautiful life could be if we noticed the same things they do?

Funnily, today as we grew up, we care about the society above anything else, we think of all the worst outcomes of every situation, we set our own limitations and crib about not progressing. The child within you is to remind you to keep going even if times are hard. The child within you wants you to write cards and give warm hugs to your mother. The child within you wants you to violate some rules so that you’ll have some memories to share. The child within you wants you to beak all your insecurities and inhibitions, it wants you to be happy, genuinely happy. The child within you wants you to set yourself free from all the boundaries.