WHY SHOULD WOMEN TRADE FREEDOM FOR SAFETY

You don’t have to be a feminist to understand this hypocrisy. Molestation and rape are committed by men but people invariably try to find a reason to blame the women. Instead of asking the perpetrator why he / they committed the crime we start contemplating as to why the victim got targeted! Is this not a supreme and abhorrent paradox?

The culture to blame the rape victim is almost pathological in our society. What clothes was she wearing? Why was she unaccompanied? Why was she on a lonely stretch of road? Why was she out so late? These are the usual questions that the society asks in the garb of a news reporter, a politician, a policeman or a judge and surprisingly almost all of them are of the mindset that it was the victim who was at fault and she should not have been in the wrong place at the wrong time! By doing so an attempt is made to find an excuse for the perpetrator for his crime and put the blame on the victim.

In today’s day and age if half the population of our country is not free to pursue their dreams, study where they want and work where they get an opportunity then are we not reducing the productivity of our nation by half? If an atmosphere of fear and anxiety prevails for our women then how will they attain their fullest potential and how on earth will our country prosper? If we get the undesirable tag of being unsafe for women then why will tourists and investments choose to come to India?

Our attitude of over-reacting to a few highly publicized rape cases in Delhi, Hyderabad and Unnao is in sharp contrast to the phenomenal under-reporting of sexual violence and rapes perpetrated within the sanctity of a so called ‘family’. The social stigma and the police apathy only adds to the problem of under-reporting and the brainless utterances of the media, the police, the politicians and the judiciary all are tailored against the victim. In which crime is the victim made a target so shamelessly?

Right from the womb the girl child is at threat. Even when schooling is free she is often kept out of school to help the mother with her domestic chores. Her social interactions are grossly curtailed and this constrain is directly proportional to the level of ignorance and lack of education of her parents and the level of caste and communal hierarchy that prevails in her society. Subdued, subjugated and socially stunted such girls are brought up with a precautionary boundary of pseudo-morality, a Lakshman Rekha, which they dare not cross lest the big bad world of wolves is waiting outside to prey on them! In a country which worships Durga and Kail why are their daughters so helpless and vulnerable to demons and asuras?

Which brings us to the question of who are these big bad wolves, demons and asuras? These are the brothers of these very helpless sisters, who are never disciplined by their parents. They are never asked why they skipped school, where did they go, why are they coming home late, whom are they befriending and what are they chewing, smoking or drinking. Total anarchy for the sons and choking of liberties of the daughters keeps not the women but the patriarchy and caste hierarchy safe and turn these unruly sons into rabid elements of the society.

It is from this abnormal breed of men folk that we derive our news reporters, our policemen, our politicians and our judiciary. So subjugation of women and the Lakshman Rekha culture is ingrained in their DNA. They fail to think differently and after every case of rape every time they open their mouth they miraculously find their foot in it. How else can they be insensitive enough to ask the unfortunate victim their usual questions – what was she wearing, why was she alone, why did she choose a lonely road, why was she out so late and how? By doing so they show their ignorance towards the feelings of the victim and at the same time, not so subtly, shift the blame of the heinous crime from the perpetrator to the victim. Unless the press, the police, our politics and our judiciary has equal proportion of women this culture of double rape first by the perpetrator and then by the system will not cease to exist.

Slogans like ‘Beti Bachao Beti Parhao’ will not change our country if we are not prepared to change our way of thinking. We have to start asking the right questions – who is the offender, whose son is he, in which school/college did he go, who are his friends, who are his relatives and who are his well wishers?  Reporters, politicians and judiciary should hound all of them with their questions and make them realize that they have failed in his upbringing and he is an insult to their position in the society. While the victim should remain unnamed the perpetrator should be named and shamed with photograph in newspapers and television. He should be ostracized from the society and his friends and family should be looked down upon. Then only will parents start disciplining their sons, relatives disown them and friends desert them.

Our girls and women do not need guardians to chaperon them when they go to study or to work. They should be given the education and the confidence to conquer the world all by themselves and the society should look up to them with respect as equal partner and not as a sex object. Those who do so are sick and should be subjected to the same treatment as rabid dogs. Please do not bother about their human rights because they are simply not human.

The government has to make public spaces women friendly with street lights, proper and efficient policing and 24x7 public transports. They should appoint more women in police and judiciary, open more courts and bring about judicial and police reforms in real earnest. Fewer adjournments, fast track courts and express delivery of justice are the need of the hour. The perpetrators have to be punished without curtailing the freedom of the women.